Today's Special: I'm sorry...

      I'm sorry... I couldn't blog lately because I'm working. Not working working. Like I'm working on homework... And UGHS it's just so stressful lately. On Saturday and Sunday I was basically working on my law homework. and now the video for law won't even open so now I have to redo EVERYTHING. which is pissing me off. I have to connect all video again to make a 27 minute and 31 second video. You know how long it takes? LONG! Like I'm going to cry because I've stayed up late until 4:00 AM just to finish it and it doesn't work anymore and in fact I now have to re do everything. And I didn't get to watch Love buffet which means that I didn't get to write a recap. Which I love doing
when it comes to a show I love. 

      I better be getting a good mark on this. Why does fate, life and the world do this to me? I'm trying to just... get a good mark. I'm TRYING! Args. like really. I may seem completely calm on the outside but inside I am SCREAMING. All the videos are left to me to edit. like I'm not some editing robot machine. I would atleast be happier if someone asked me if I was okay. If I needed help. If they'd stay up with me and tell me it's okay. 

      I still have to write my composition and finish my History slides for the powerpoint tomorrow. I have Spanish homework and I need to do my course selections. Like why does it have to be all NOW? I'm so stressed. I want to cry but I never do. I don't know what stops me. I really... REALLY want a break. I want to Cry. I JUST WANT TO CRY. but I can't. I end up laughing. This time I've bottled up alot, maybe so much it just won't come out anymore and I've fallen into a depressing state. Rejecting all possible out breaks from this. I don't even know if anyone reads this blog and understands what I'm trying to say like. EVER feel this way? Like you want to run and hide and cry but you know the consequences or nature just doesn't allow you to? I wish something amazing came up and I was saved from all this stress...